There’s nothing we can’t talk about…but safety first!

When I first started my career I worked closely with adolescents.  I would find myself frequently saying, “there’s nothing we can’t talk about, but first you have to be safe”.  This was always in response to behavior that had led to the respective teen being brought into the emergency room or directly admitted to the behavioral unit.   I would take their feelings of self harm seriously and no matter what issues they might have been facing, their safety was the priority.  In all areas of life this applies.  Safety first.

I am not a timid person.  I have spent nearly 36 years working with and advocating for those who have mental health issues.  But, lately I have come to believe that I am a coward.  I have been concerned for quite some time about safety.   The safety of this country that I love and call home.  I have been privately angry and alarmed with  increased concern, yet have remained publicly silent.  Always, the peacemaker I did not want to chance alienating anyone who might not like what I would say.   Silence has a way of eating away at one’s soul and I can no longer stay quiet.  I must have the courage of my convictions; risking backlash and speak my peace.   I will express these views, thus my truth,  with respect for those who differ from me.  I will not yell, threaten or name call.   But, there are things that have to be said.

As this past week’s news has unfolded and I watched the many networks cover it, I had a sick feeling.  While it can be difficult to watch both liberal and conservative media and their commentaries, it is also necessary and enlightening.  Like me, everyone has their own truth.  But if you can listen…really listen… you can find a common truth among most.  It takes patience.  They talk over each other, some dismiss opposing views and all are passionate and eager to have their voice heard and understood.  All are sure their view is the right one.  Agree or not with what you hear, you will also come to know that they aren’t all “fake news” .  Some are better than others in their reporting.  Some are better at being objective, at conveying differing points of view and truly do their best to be accurate.   But, again, you have to listen.  Social media is not much different.  People yelling (putting everything in capital letters) at each other, name calling, even unfriending those who differ in opinion.  Speaking their own opinion in absolutes.  There is no tolerance or acceptance of other’s views.  Every one is so certain their way is the only way.  Their view is the only one.

I am at great risk of alienating many because I am non-partisan.  I’ve been accused by conservatives of being liberal and been told by a few liberals that my views are too conservative.  I take comfort in knowing that means I truly am non-partisan and right where I want to be.  I do not want to focus on political parties.  Both parties are flawed and have been a disappointment to me.  Right now, neither seems to have an agenda or an interest in what is best for the country.  Each working independently at the exclusion of the other.   This is not new and contributes to the discord we are now seeing.  Bipartisanship is rare.   This is not a Republican or a Democrat problem. This is an American problem.    We are a nation divided with a growing safety/security issue. For me, the greatest threat to the nation’s security these days does not come from outside our borders, but from within.

We have a democracy that empowers the American people to choose their leadership.  This comes with the understanding that elected representatives (President, Vice-President, Senate and Congress) will advocate for their constituents and “support and defend” the constitution.  That is not happening.  I respect our constitution and  accept that Donald Trump is President.  For a year now, whenever there is disagreement the” go to” has been that if you don’t like something about the President it is because you don’t accept that he is President.  I do accept this fact.  That doesn’t mean that I can’t or shouldn’t express concerns.   I have an interest in healthcare, immigration, tax reform and so many more important issues.  All are often lost in the chaos we see on a daily basis.  All are worthy of discussion.    But again, Safety first.

None of my opinions regarding the President are based on what I hear from the main stream media, though I do make sure that I connect with both liberal and conservative media.  You learn nothing if you only listen to people who are like minded and share your view.  That may be more comfortable, but not helpful in seeing a fuller picture.   I have concerns about our President and by extension concerns for the safety of our country.  These concerns are focused on his behavior, his words and his tweets.  Never in my life time has a President communicated so much with the people.  I give him credit for that.  However, because of this communication we cannot claim ignorance and act as though we do not know or hear what is happening.  We do not have deniability.  If we remain silent and do not address the “elephant in the living room”, then we are complicit.

You do not have to listen to me.  Listen to the President.    Candidate Trump knows his supporters and once said that he “could stand in the middle of 5th Avenue and shoot somebody and I wouldn’t lose voters”.  The questions for these supporters are do you believe him and will you support him under any circumstance?   If you are going to believe him, believe all he says.  Believe his tweets.  In June, 2017, then Press Secretary Sean Spicer said the President’s tweets are official statements.

So… Believe him when he contradicts himself,  which he does frequently.   Believe him when he will disrespect Senators and Congressmen from both parties, but embrace white supremacists and those accused of inappropriate sexual behavior.  He is also accused of inappropriate sexual behavior.  Again, Believe him.  You heard him in the Access Hollywood tape.  Believe his multiple conspiracy theories that have no basis in facts.   Believe him when he repeatedly speaks in an antagonistic voice, name calling an already unstable North Korean leader.  Believe him when he repeatedly undermines your confidence in any and all sources of information that are not him.  Believe him when he takes responsibility for nothing, blaming predecessors Republican and Democrat alike.   Believe him, when he retweets a British white supremacist group.  If you don’t think it matters, then you should listen to the British Prime Minister, London’s Mayor and members of the British Parliament.  They showed no humor in their response to the President’s ill advised retweet.  One UK lawmaker went so far as to suggest that the Prime Minister could persuade the President to delete his twitter account while the Mayor of London asked for an apology to the British people.  Other nations speak out while we as a country continue to tolerate this behavior and by default are complicit.   It is not just bad judgement.  He is divisive, unfocused, unpredictable and impulsive.  You do not have to be a mental health professional to understand that there are real concerns.    Remember…Safety First!

Some people voted for President Trump because they considered him the “lesser of two evils” and despised Hillary Clinton.  Others wanted change.  Whether they believed he would get rid of Obamacare, appoint the best Supreme Court Justices or build the wall, he spoke to people and they put their hopes in him.  He resonated with an angry America.  The question is, are people so angry that they are willing to accept his poor behavior, even if it places us in danger?   Remember he is the leader of the free world and it is right for us to expect him to act accordingly.  Not as a misogynist, a racist or a bigot, but as a calm, even tempered, clear thinking leader.  Not thin skinned, ranting at those he doesn’t like or that dare to disagree with him.  There is tunnel vision with this President and the view that many have of him.  While he has been both a Democrat and Republican in his lifetime, he represents neither conservative or liberal values.  He is the party of Trump.  That still aligns with many as the polls tells us.  When I hear how low the polls are, I wonder why they are so high.   But, really that does not matter.  What matters now is how we move forward.  How do we come together?  How do regain creditability that has been lost with other nations?  How do we find our way back to being the United States?  How do we ensure that we as a nation are safe?

I am pro-America.   There are people who will say they are pro-Trump and pro-America.  That is hard to reconcile when you have someone so erratic and by all appearances seems to be coming  unhinged.  While I will not diagnose this President or attach labels to him,  I have grave concerns about his mental health.

I keep hoping there will be an awakening.  I’m praying that people will step back from their anger and lean on their common sense.  Know and trust what they see and hear.   It will mean putting personal agenda’s aside and focusing on the safety of our nation.  These are serious times in need of serious consideration.  I am not interested in debating.  The time for debate is over.  This is not about I’m right and your wrong.  It’s about a fast growing problem that needs all of us to solve it.   We should be on the same side when it comes to national safety and security.  A wall will not stop a nuclear attack.  Remember what I said earlier, there’s nothing we can’t talk about…. but first, we have to be safe.   The world is waiting and watching.  We need to show them who we really are.

Some believe there is nothing one man or one woman can do against the enormous array of the world’s ills–against misery, against ignorance, or injustice and violence.  Yet many of the world’s great movements, of thought and action, have flowed from the work  of a single man.  A young monk began the Protestant reformation, a young general extended an empire from Macedonia to the borders of the earth, and a young woman reclaimed the territory of France.  It was a young Italian explorer who discovered the New World, and 32 year old Thomas Jefferson who proclaimed that all men are created equal.  “Give me a place to stand,” said Archimedes ” and I will move the world.”   These men moved the world and so can we all. ~Robert Kennedy~

Silent no more….

Blessings,

Tammy

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